This book is the property of E̶l̸u̴r̵i̷c̸ ̴H̸a̸y̸w̶a̷r̷d̴ ̵&̵ A'erina Maxhavo.

Well, we finally did it, with Erin's alchemical knowledge and my know-how, we managed to make a suppressant. I don't know how effective it will be but she hasn't shown any signs of aggressive behaviour since she started taking it a sennight ago. The results are exactly what we had hoped, all that's left to do is wait and see how long the effects last. I've got her this book as a gift, so she can write as much as she wants in here.

( A few days later.)

It doesn't last as long as we had wanted. I'm sure its lasting just over a day, I can't be sure though, she lost her temper and got violent but nothing too bad. It seems to react different based on what she's doing. We had an argument and the effects of the suppressant didnt last nearly as long. On the other hand, we spent some time outside tending the plants and the effects lasted longer than expected. I'll have to run some more tests, especially with her behaviour both negative and positive.

Several small drawings, aswell as the mix for the suppresant seem to be scribbled in on the page.

A few recipes dot both pages, small depictions aswell as colours to show what the mix SHOULD look like. There's a Sleeping Potion, A recipe for Echo Drops, aswell as a more sinister poisoning concoction.

(A'erina's writing - For the record she can write but its terrible so just assume its just fucking badly written :D)

Did Eluric really want to arrange a ceremony for us? Hard to think that I'd say yes so quickly, dad's probably still furious with me about ignoring what he wanted. I don't care though, this is what I've always wanted, that opportunity to just live a normal life, to have my own family, I'd be a good mother. Besides, I don't want to hurt anyone, Eluric said that he's gonna keep helping me work on that and we've come so far. He's heading to Coerthas in a fortnight because he's spoken to someone and a friend of his in Ishgard thinks they might have something that could get rid of this for good! All I can do is keep taking this stuff until he gets home. I'm gonna miss him but he won't be gone too long, he said he won't be there longer than two, maybe three days. If you read this know that I love you so much for helping me with all of this!

Most of the following pages have alchemical recipes on, some with pictures of monsters like Ochu and Sabotenders, their body parts or some other components immensely useful in certain recipes, a quick reference guide to most of A'erina's creations. Some pages stick out differently from the rest though,

Page 13 has a picture of a comically and badly drawn morbol using Bad Breath with giant words scribbled over it “ DANGEROUS - DO NOT ENCOUNTER ” followed by small writing underneath “ Liquid Bad Breath, if obtained, can be very useful, need to ask her cousin to go kill a few. ”

Page 18 has a few spots of dried up blood on it, and a couple of sentences written by Eluric.

“Erin completely lost it today, she's asleep now and I don't know when, or if she'll wake up. It's been five bells since I managed to subdue her. She's not even the same person when this happens, did we do something wrong with the suppressant? I'm leaving for Ishgard tomorrow, I need to put an end to this before it gets any worse, she's going to seriously hurt someone, I write this as I was the one she attacked, luckily the axe didn't cut too deep this time and the potions she makes are really useful, she's a great chemist when she puts her mind to it, I'm lucky to have her. When I get back, we're gonna get this mess sorted out and we're gonna have our ceremony, Just hold on a few more days, Erin.”

Between pages 8 and 9 is where A'erina has stowed a handwritten letter, presumably just placed in between two pages at random, It looks to have been done recently, perhaps in the past moon or so. It's recipients obvious.

Mum & Dad,

If this letter finds it's way to you, something unfortunate might have happened to me.

I know it's been a few years since you saw me, and it may be a few years before I want to see you, but just know that I never forgot about either of you. I've gotten in with the wrong crowds and I've made some terrible mistakes, and I can't come home right now, or ever. I'm no longer seeing Eluric, A long story short is, he left to deal with something and he never came back. Dad, if you're the one reading this, I can imagine that stupid, awkward smile you always have on your face right now. Were you right about him? My Choices? Probably, but I'll not give you the satisfaction of you being able to say it to my face. The whole thing was complicated and I don't ever expect you to understand my feelings.

I haven't been too far, but far enough that I was always able to avoid you. I just had to be away from you until I had found out what I wanted, who I wanted to be. You drove me away but I still love you, and I always will. I've been to Othard, you know? I still get seasick, but it was a change of scenery you can only imagine from reading a book. I went with Gair, He's looking after me, and I'd be lost without him, he's like the brother we never had. He's not as bad as you make him out to be, dad, you need to give him a chance and he can prove it to you one day. Don't let him know what I think about him though, I've been keeping up a bravado attitude around him and wouldn't want him knowing what I really think, it'd make him think I can't handle myself which I can!

Oh yea! Thanks for the Sword, mum! It helped me so much ever since I got it, it's lightweight, and the perfect size, I know A'ralia gave it to me, but I know you … P.T.O

On the other side of the paper -

Probably couldn't resist picking up the hammer and giving me something for my nameday. It was unexpected, but the craftsmanship was never in doubt, and I've been using it for the Grindstone! I almost won once! It's been pretty lonely for a couple of years now though, but I've made enough friends to maybe not feel so alone. I've been making potions and stuff in a lab I got built, it's something else, for sure. I got a job working in a tavern once a week, I go around calling myself a mixologist because I started using my Alchemy know-how to make drinks behind a bar, it's like a hidden talent. The boss is a nice Ishgardian, a temple knight to boot, She's kinda great, A'tira would get on well with her since she wanted to be a knight too, unless she changed her mind? Oh, and Then there is Pipino, when I first met her I wasn't so sure, but something about her… I dunno, but now I feel like she is one of my best friends, even if she doesn't know it, although I guess if this letter gets out, then she would. Then again, I probably won't be around to find out.

I'm sorry things haven't always been the best between us, but I can never forgive you for the things you said to me. I'm using this letter as a means to at least say goodbye to you, if I can't do it myself, I'd hope someone would be able to do it on my behalf.

Tell the girls I love them all, even A'elana.

I don't think there's anything left unsaid here. I'm sorry for everything.

Love you,

A'erina

Page 19 onwards sees the book become A'erina's, as opposed to a shared journal between the two.

It's been about 17 days now… He said 3 days at most. I've got 4 days worth of suppressants left, I cant make it without him, all I have is this book. Where is he? I'm going to have to go to Ishgard soon or make it myself. I'll try and record everything that I do and just hope.

( a sennight later.)

I managed another week, and I think I'm getting the hang of it. I'm going to call it I.B.S for now since I can't think of a better name for it. I've made a batch that will last me over a moon for now, it will have to do. Eluric still hasn't come home…

( a moon passes by.)

The house is destroyed again, I had an outburst 2 days ago, luckily it was just the house and I didnt manage to smash the door to pieces, I must have exhausted my Aether and passed out because I dont remember what happened other than grabbing that axe and ruining our home. I'm going to work on a stronger substitute over the next few days, so I cant leave the house. I might need to ask Aunt Tera to bring me a few things because she's the only person that will listen to me.

I did it! It only took me 3 moons but I've finally created a mix that lasts a full sun! It's not effected by my behaviour or mood either, I can leave the house and not worry for now. I've been giving it test runs and it's exactly what I have been trying to perfect.

Eluric has been gone for 4 moons now. I've been to Ishgard and not a single person could help me out. What the hells happened and why won't he come home… Maybe he's gone and I'm just too stupid to face the truth.

( the book was then discarded and left for 2, almost 3 full years.)

It's been awhile since I wrote anything in this, I screwed up a mix and I remember putting the recipe in here, Morbol Tentacles… Not Ochu ones! A careless beginner's mistake. Wont happen again, gonna keep this book handy and scribble out his name. He never did come home, by the way, I still don't know what happened but I think I'm better off not knowing. I think I'm gonna use this to make sure I dont forget anything or anyone. Just in case, I've noticed that when I lose control and I wake up, it feels like I'm losing part of myself each time. I dont want to forget anyone, so I need to write here asmuch as I can, just as a reminder.

What happened to you? I wish I knew, I can't remember the last time I slept properly. It's been almost 3 years, maybe it's time I let go…

Got a delivery to make later, small one, just up at the apartments, 5 minutes at most, nice and simple, just the way I like it. It's only some moko anyways, nothing too bad. I'm pretty good with this stuff, easy money too! Sabert's been helping me out, even though I know what the pervert is after, talking about pulling my tail. I'll sort him out once he's not useful anymore.

( After her delivery that was not 5 minutes but 2 or 3 bells)

It was Gair! Of all people, my delivery was for Gair. He lives in an apartment so close and I never knew! I've been sheltered up at home far too long and family are right at my doorstep… Actually this is bad, what if dad finds out. Gonna have to move, into an apartment, maybe over in the shroud, he hates it there, just incase. Can't let anyone find me, especially dad. But I just got all this lab done, maybe I just need to work on some things, I should be alright, nothing to worry about if I can pull a few favours with some guys. I'm going to head over to the Shroud for a few days to lay low so I can work things out.

Got involved with Gair and his companions. Seems that even they needed someone with my talents, hard to deny my skills with a bow though. And mixing poison tipped arrows into it all is going to be that much sweeter.

A hastily drawn arrow and a recipe for a poison from a diremite stinger are on the page

Suppressant still working, atleast. Don't know how I feel about his friends though. Going to start writing about them all just incase. Got to pick up on the details, not going to get used again. I plan on running from this though, this isn't my fight.

I left this book here just incase, we were gone for a shorter time than I had expected. I guess you still haven't come back. Not used to so much fighting though. Sure could have used you, y'know? Things would have went alot quicker and I'd be home sooner. Made it back regardless, despite that conjurer pet of Gair's, or that other woman trying to use their vile magic on me. I'm an alchemist, I can make stuff far better than whatever magic crap they can use. I don't like any of these people he chooses for company, starting to think I don't even like Gair anymore, he was always a nice little kid, even as a teen, what the hell happened with him? Might have to keep my eye on him some more, unless it's because of A's—-

( During writing, A'erina was full of tears and having little sleep across a few days, she passed out from mental and phsyical exhaustion.)

It's not even important, just going to hang around for a bit longer, I need some things here and there so I can carry on with some work. They're a capable bunch so I'm just gonna have to tolerate it, atleast for now, once I've got what I want, I'm out of here. Sell the house, sell everything, use the gil to move somewhere else, start fresh, maybe head out east away from everyone.

Hard to think I'd encounter family again, after everything was said, then again I never had any issues with Aunt Tera and her family, even treated me like her own daughter more often than not. He has become quite easy on the eyes in adulthood though… No, I can't think like that! Focus, Rina! Thats the least of my concern with him, ever since we've reconnected, I feel like he's hiding something, keeping my eye on him for now.

I keep seeing him talking to the air infront of him, or over his shoulder, when there is nobody there. No people, no animals, not even a poster, or a lamp, or anything. Who's he talking to, and why? Just what the fuck are you hiding from us.

He's going to get us all killed, signing a contract with that damn Lalafell, and acting so casually about it, what the fuck is his problem, I'm not going to get killed because of this… Seems she's loaded though, maybe this is his intention as well, which I can't fault. Arsehole.

I lost control and he stopped me. I hate him. Maybe I want this more than anything, and he stopped that. This power, this strength, even Gair can't stop me if I could use it. Maybe if I can make something that'll shut him up for a few suns…

I've figured it out. He's carrying one of those Soul Crystals around. He's talking to it! to someone… Inside the crystal? I don't know how they work, I need to get ahold of one sometime and see what secrets they hold. Seems the one he has is giving him some dark powers of some kind. Gonna have to make sure Luna is aware of this, I think she may be the only one that can stop him if he undergoes some dramatic changes.

I haven't wrote much on Gair recently, he's been away from us, doing some things out in the Sea of Clouds and such, Wonder what he's been doing out there. Guess I'm finally warming upto him, and he seems to be himself atleast for now.

I didn't want to ask Luna for help, I've grown a strong dislike for Coerthas, Ishgard and all the other shit that comes with it. I figured she'd have access to documents and the like being a Temple Knight and everything so I asked her to see what became of Eluric. I'm not sure if I even want to know anymore…

( page left blank until shortly returning home from visiting Luna.)

I can't believe it, all this time he's been alive… (cue caps because angry) A FUCKING ELEZEN, WHAT DOES SHE HAVE THAT I DONT? BIG FUCKING UGLY EARS? OH YES OF COURSE, TALL FUCKING DHALMELS ARE EVERYONES DREAM PARTNER. YOU ARE A FUCKING MIDLANDER YOU IDIOT SHES TWICE YOUR DAMNED SIZE. A FUCKING KID TOO, BEEN BUSY WHILE HES BEEN GONE, AMNESIA YEA FUCKING RIGHT YOU ALWAYS WERE FULL OF SHIT YOU ABSOLUTE BASTARD.

( the rest of the page seems to have been ripped out.)

An unknown page number at the back of the book ( Number of pages within the book is unknown until further notice.)

I really don't trust this woman. This holy bullshit she spouts. Justice, honour? We're not gonna get on well at all, I just know it. Maybe its a facade for something else. Maybe she's a natural born killer but uses a Temple Knight as a guise to cover up who, or what, she really is. Will keep my eye on her for now. Started calling her yeti because she looks like one, everyone else is in agreement though. Round 1 to Rina.

After our incident, Luna seemed to make it out realtively unscatched, not like I care, I still think she's hiding something and until I can prove it, I need to make sure I don't become too friendly with her.

This whole thing is Luna's fault, she should have never told me, She can take those documents and shove them up that fucking arse of hers. I hope she dies, or better yet, let be the one to end her life. Nothing would please me more, she's ruined everything. No one would miss her. A simple poison that lasts a few days, no one would suspect anything.

Luna has started taking care of a younger hyur, almost like a mother to them, I don't like this at all, especially the rat she has. Just what is it you hope to accomplish by doing this? I cannot figure you out, but I know inside you're no different than the rest of us. Might see if I can prod and poke her to get something to happen. Could start with the kid.

Luna, if you ever read this… I'm sorry for everything I've ever said to you. I don't deserve to have you around, I'll make it upto you one day and I'll be able to prove to you that I really am not the horrible person I've painted myself to be. Just once I want to be able to call you my friend, right now I find it impossible, but someday I'm going to set things right between us, I promise.

It's been about 16 days now. I smashed the Linkpearl so nobody could talk to me, I just need to be alone. All of this because of you, and then to find out everything. Only reason I'm writing here is because Sesera came over to check on me, she nearly smashed the door down with that hammer the first time, she refused to leave until I had calmed down, she's been coming over every few days to check on me. From what she told me, I had locked myself in, which was a good thing. The lab is completely destroyed, I can't make anything now, I'll never control this thing… I'm going to lose the house, next time Sesera is over I'm gonna ask her to get me away, I can't go back to living with Dad, and I can't stay with my friends, especially Luna, I'm likely to kill her. Hoping I can salvage some things to get the gil together.

( 2 days later, and some neat handwriting clearly not belonging to A'erina)

Stupid cat, you're giving me grey hairs and I'm only 23! You're not going anywhere, not yet. You're like a sister to me, and I'm gonna help you out, Just give me some time to work on it. And STOP taking that damn mix you keep making, darling! if something else don't kill you, that will! I'm gonna start filling in this book for you some too, I don't much like writing, so don't expect much, but I know what nasties can give you some good reagents, so I'll make sure to write in here whenever I can for you.

Book was in Sesera's posession for a moon or two. She catalogued a handful of monsters, and properties of some of the things that can be obtained from them. Who'd have thought you can make Glue out of Dragon, Drake and Biast scales? Sesera doesn't, but when presenting them to A'erina, she knew almost instantly what to do with them. Sesera also spent a sennight amidst the dragons and, when channelling aether to her mouth, was able to mimic a dragon and spew flames in the form of a flamethrower. The perks of a Blue Mage!

The following 5 pages managed to rekindle A'erina's desire for alchemy, perhaps even more so than normal. After the two of them spent some time together fixing her lab, she spent more time down there.

There's less drugs than there used to be. But more poisons. Which would have many alarms ringing if someone knew what she was upto.

We're all gonna die. Why'd he have to open his big mouth and put us in the employ of this Lalafell? Why do I have to sign a contract? WHO EVEN CARRIES PAPERS LIKE THAT AROUND?! Monetarists… Hate them. Doesn't seem like she's hiding anything though so I won't have to spy on, or shadow her. Can't argue about the money though, she seems wealthy.

She called us up late at night yesterday, something about portals and seeing things like corpses and some crazy guy. Sounds to me like she was on something and she was freaking out about the high. It would have been hilarious if not for her covered in blood. Perhaps I was wrong and she absolutely is hiding something, gonna have to start shadowing her just to be sure.

We got into an argument and I attacked her, I'm blaming it on this stupid curse of mine, I'm not taking any responsibility for it. I was aware of what I was doing but I can't control it. Luckily everyone else was there before things got too bad. I've agreed to stop shadowing her, she's not acting as suspicious anymore anyways, I'll just leave her to it.

Pipino of all people coming to ask me about drugs, who would have thought it. Her coming to me for help, didn't know what else to do so I sent her to Sabert, he still owes me after that. Hope she finds whatever it is she's after though, I offered to go with her but she declined, she's going to get hurt, I know it. She needs to toughen up anyways.

I don't think she likes me anymore, the very person she told me to stay away from, I went and sought out. Yet another disagreement ensued, right in the middle of the QuickSand. I may have said some things that I regret. But she doesn't understand, he might be able to help me. Someday I'll be able to make everyone understand, not just you.

(Approximately 2 moons since getting it back from Sesera.)

It's been awhile since I wrote anything in here, feels like it was moons ago. I've been trying to forget everything, It's kind of ironic when you think about it. I've been writing in this book so I don't forget anything, and yet here I am saying I want to forget. I've been keeping everything bottled up now, thing's have been easier since doing so. It's easier for me to not get close to anyone, that way I don't hurt them, or let them know what's really going on. I've been doing some tests to try something out, Hopefully it works.

(several bells later)

All this time it was staring me right in the face. It doesn't fully work, that much is certain but the more I– (BIG SPLOTCH OF SOMETHING ALCHEMICAL HAS SMUDGED WORDS.) –ens the likelihood that it'll happen. Can't let anyone know just yet, need to be sure. Might have to stop taking it for a short while, hopefully nothing bad happens.

(The following day after Grindstone)

Another loss, what a surprise. Did another test earlier, checked some things when I got back, it's as I feared. I can't have children anymore. Seems like everyday I'm moving away from that perfect life I had wanted so much. I really do have nothing left. Spoke to Vinalo today after my loss, I like them and they mean well, but they don't seem to understand that when I say I'm not afraid to die, that I have nothing to live for, that I genuinely mean it. They insist that for my own sake, and everyone elses that I shouldn't go see Eli… But that's why seeing him might give me that last few pieces of the puzzle I need to solve things, he has to know something I don't. If he's going to kill me, so be it. Just need to stay on his good side best I can, It'll be a good reason to experiment while im out there too.

Most of these pages have been filled with a staggering amount of alchemical recipes and concoctions. Page 45 smells faintly of ale, coupled with a few words that seem to have been smudged. She would share her discoveries and mixes if asked.

Wow, I came so close to winning the Grindstone today! Just one morewin and I'd have been the champion! I hope that wasn't my only chance and I blew it, still, what a rush, fighting so hard like tha–…

( A'erina was sleepy so she took a big ol' nap.)

Had a dream…it all makes sense now. I'm finally starting to see things more clearly, now. They're afraid of me, they always have been. Eluric knew this, that's why he fled, he knew I could… No… I WOULD kill him. That's why he went to Coerthas, to get away from me. This power… This strength… At the Grindstone, watching them fall one by one until that last battle… reminds me of that woman I killed at Occidens all that time ago, watching her life fade away as she bled right infront of me. She looked up at me as if she was begging not to die… So weak. This is what I have been missing all along, Just gonna have to rely on my mixing for now, If I can control it, JUST THINK OF WHAT YOU CAN DO A'ERINA! Maybe I'll head to Ishgard and find him, poison his dhalmel and his kid too, watch as they slowly choke on their own blood with one of my morbol poisons? Or what about a more corrosive one? Watch as their insides become their outsides. That would put a smile on my face. Once I'm done there, come back to Ul'dah like nothing has happened. if anyone asks any questions, kill them too. You've got your escape plan all set up now anyways, and no one even knows about it. Yes, this is perfect. Just act like yourself and no one will even know you were involved. Going to work on this though, I've been blind to it all this time, it's not a curse, its a gift, a blessing. This is nothing but strength and power, and I'm squandering it by playing barmaid in a tavern, with people I can't even tolerate. Who cares if I can't control myself, It's still me anyway, and I'm aware of what's going on. To watch the destruction I can cause… They'll see. I'll make them see.

(A sennight later)

I couldn't do it. All that preparation for me to walk away. How… Why… That was my life… That was what I wanted… she took him away from me, she took my life… But then why did I just stand there, perhaps she felt sorry for me? Don't often see Miqo'te out in Ishgard anyways, probably thought I was lost. She didn't even question anything… maybe she didn't know at all. Watching that child snuggled into her arms… I couldn't do it. I'm not a monster, not like that, not to someone like her, or the kid, they didnt do anything to me. I think I get it it now though, Eluric was never mine. He always belonged to her, I was just meant to make sure he got there. I'm not meant to be happy, I'm just supposed to be here. Be the friend that they can talk to even if I dont mean anything I say. Be an extra pair of hands for when the work is tough even if hard work is beneath me. Just be there for someone when I'm needed most, even if I dont want to. Gonna go to the early moonfire stuff one last time, might see if I can get A'tira to come with me, she always insisted we go and I do miss seeing my favourite little sister.

I think Tira hates me for leaving, I spoke to Liana today and she said until I come home she wants nothing to do with me. Thanks for turning my sisters against me dad. Honestly Liana only talks to me because she wants every detail about Gair… I'm not the one looking after him, go find him yourself if you like him so much. On my way back bumped into Luna and Luca, Tret was there too… hope they got a good look as I was spewing everywhere like a drunk morbol. Some cat came up on us too, looked alot like A'liana, until they got up in my face then I realised I'd have slapped my parents for keeping a sister like that. Always hated other cats though, no idea why. Must be the tails.

• Currently 63 Years Old.

• Husband and father to the Maxhavo family. Some would say his skill is a bowyer is remarkable, but in his retirement, he's passed on that skill to his seven daughters. Unfortunately only three of them still continue his line of work. Longing for a son, after his seventh daughter was born, and he felt he was at the end of his prime at 42, he gave up trying, choosing to share his work with his daughters. He wed his long-time love, A'rana when he was just 24, although he was quite beside himself when she said yes with no hesitation. His skill with a bow used to be something to behold, but it has been quite some time since he used one. A very traditional old man, he'd like to see his daughters pair up with other Miqo'te. Despite this, he can be a fantastic father when he's not got his head so far up his own arse.

• Currently 60 Years old.

• Wife to A'xhuv Nunh, An almost-retired Blacksmith, she feels like she can squeeze a few more years of working the forge before she's finished. Her craftsmanship isn't the best, and she will happily tell you that, but the durability is beyond comparison, as some weapons of her making can last a lifetime. Having seven daughters proved taxing, and often saw her stepping away from the hammer far more often than she'd like. She wanted to trying to teach them but only one of them showing interest. She dotes on her youngest, A'uriel , and one day hopes to leave the smithy work to her, to continue on the Maxhavo's undeniable ability for hard work.

• Twins - 36 Years Old ( A'elana born 3 minutes before A'kyra.)

• The oldest daughter (s) of A'xhuv and A'rana. Blessed with twins for their first offspring, their parents were ecstatic. A'elana has become an adept conjurer, her healing magics are unrivalled as far as she's concerned. Somewhat stuck up and self-centered she prides herself on her abilities and an ideal world would see her healing people left and right just to flaunt her magical gift. She has little love for A'erina, and no one really knows why.

• A'kyra on the other hand, is one of the sisters who closely follow in their father's footsteps, although slightly favouring making rather exceptional quivers for the would-be adventurer and archer's of all kinds. The more level-headed of the twins, she has tried to be the glue throughout the years to try and keep their family in one piece. Slightly jealous of A'erina, but arguably has a strong bond with her.

• 33 Years old

• A'ralia is the younger sister of the twins, but that hasn't stopped her being the very image her father wants her to be. Exceptional marksmanship, and can make arrows and bows with ease. The full Maxhavo package bundled into this small, as small as Miqo'te get, Cat. Is probably the dumbest member of the family, and often teased/teases A'erina over her own stupidity, in an attempt to make her look far more intelligent than she actually is. Despite that, A'erina actually enjoys A'ralia's company… When they see each other, that is.

• 27 Years old

• A'liana is the 5th born daughter, and at this point it was questionable whether A'xhuv and A'rana could even conceive a son. Following A'erina's birth 3 years prior, They had all but given up, but then A'liana shows up. This is the lazy one of the family, spending most of her days hanging around at home, refusing to move out, living in her parents basement. Refuses to do the housework because she's 'prepping' for when Gair finally asks her to be his wife. The entire family knows that won't happen, but what do they know? Constantly bugging A'erina for tidbits of information. Likely has a creepy shrine to Gair somewhere.

• 24 Years old

• 6th born daughter, A'xhuv begun losing his mind. A'tira looks up to her older sister A'erina more than the others, using her as a role model. An accident involving them both, messing around with A'rana's forge, when they were younger saw A'tira lose her voice. She hasn't been able to utter a word for over 16 years but she smiles enough to let everyone know she's okay. Arguably the most upset about A'erina being turned away from the family a few years ago, and through her lack of being able to speak, she blamed herself for not standing in Rina's corner when the family began to fall apart. This cat would die for her sister, which is why she spends some of her days training as a pugilist. Just incase Rina ever needs her help.

• 21 Years old

• The baby of the family. After fathering 7 daughters, he ultimately gave up, as he was coming to the end of his prime. That's not to say he isn't happy, he loves all of his daughters and would do anything for them. A'uriel is her mother's protegee, working the forge all day, A'rana knows her time as a Smithy is coming to an end, so she is departing all of her knowledge onto A'uriel as best she can. All too happy to continue this line of work, A'uriel's smithing abilities have already raised a few ears, but not enough just yet. A'uriel is the most loving and friendliest of the family, often sending letters when her sisters are gone for no more than a sennight. She often met with A'erina in secrecy so that neither of them upset the parents. She made A'erina a sword for her nameday, But she's giving her mother all the credit. Spends alot of time at A'tera's, because BFF's with A'thasri.

Got an invite to go and get in on the Moonfire festivities from everyone. I already went but I decided to go anyways, I feel like I hadn't seen my friends for awhile so it was nice to see them. I went and grabbed some fireworks and stuff because it was the last day to celebrate so might aswell make the most of it. Fish & Chips though… yuck, it's so easy for people to cook though so I can't fault them. Ended up in the water by the end of the evening, Gair and Langston practically dragged me into the water, the saltwater wasnt good for my hair at all. Jokes on them though, I can swim, I just dont like the water. Made me realise that I'm grateful for these friends, hopefully can make it upto them one day. Oh, and that cat from Limsa showed up out of nowhere too, I hope they dont make a habit of it. Then their brother shows up out of nowhere, seemed to know Pipino though, but immediately comes over to me and starts hitting on me and asks me out on a date? I agreed, the look on the cat's face was a picture, Vinalo looked pretty confused too. Shows that I'm not that predictable. This poor guy, I'm going to eat him alive.

( after said 'date')

Was at Eli's place and reading some books, i've come so close to figuring it out, I haven't seen him in awhile, I want to thank him for pointing me in the right direction and to tell him how much progress I have made. I thought the place was empty but then he shows up and was grateful that I showed up for this ' date'. Novine and that one Lalafell were there too. He made something to eat and then wanted to fight me. As far as dates go, this wasnt weird but it was certainly up there with them. I beat him up a bit, as expected, everyone seems to underestimate how strong I am. I felt bad after though because I dropped my sword on his head, that thing can hurt! I'm gonna get out of this, if he hangs around that place too, and from what I gather is working for Novine, that's some bad shit I don't want to get involved in.

He showed up at the Grindstone, he was gone pretty quickly but I saw him and told him that he cant just give up a fight.

What the fuck. Even writing here I keep thinking about him… Do I like him? Makes no sense to me, all this time and when I finally begin to accept that the life I want, the happiness I want, I can never have. I need some sleep, I'm confused.

I got my book back from Lucian when he came by the Tavern, but as I figured, it was empty, he means well but he cant help me. It's fine, I'll work on it. He showed up while I was working, brought me a flower too, he's charming, for a cat, that's for sure.

I'm sure of it after this evening though, I like him.

I don't deserve to feel this way, I never have, but just being around him I feel calm and focused. I might keep seeing him and see what happens. Gonna go and see Novine next Spellstone, talk to her about it.

(Few days later)

That Lami told me some things about F'loki. Don't even know if I'll see him again, she talked about him being captured or dead. I knew it was too good to be true, I let my guard down briefly and this is what happens. I'm just gonna stay away from this shit now. I'm done with all of it.

Goodbye, Until Tomorrow

A'erina is sitting down under a tree, her shoulder dislocated as she puts a stick in her mouth, biting down on it hard as she attempts to put it back in place. She yells in pain but successfully does so and spits the stick to the ground. She removes a bandage from her other arm, pouring the contents of a vial onto a now exposed cut. Having sorted her sustained injuries out, she rests against the tree and reflects for a moment.

“ It's been… four? Maybe five nights I've seen now… Could be six, it gets pretty cold out here at night so I started climbing upto ledges on the mountainside for safety. Using my aether really took it out of me so I couldn't get back home right now even if I wanted to. I managed to stop a group of brigands as they were robbing a bunch of merchants. Had their hands tied and heads covered and looked ready to slaughter them once they got their loot. It went quicker than I imagined but that's because it took over me again. It's becoming more frequent and it hurts, a dislocated shoulder and it can just shrug it off, meanwhile I get left with having to struggle on my own?”

A'erina looked up at the sky, the sun was setting in the distance and she'd have to get back to her temporary makeshift camp before nightfall. She got to her feet and walked away from the tree. This was not going as she had planned. She looked in her satchel and held out a linkpearl in front of her. She considered putting it in her ear for a moment just to hear a voice but shaking her head with an audible “No.”

“ I miss you already…” she closed her eyes for a few seconds before returning the pearl back into her bag. “Just wait a little longer, 'kay?”

Rush of Power

Finding What's Next

Yes, Hello, I'm Bad at Writing

Make sure when I get back to try and see if I can reduce the amount of time it takes for the gas to vanish. It's taking too long, and I'm likely to forget once all this is sorted. Took me moons to find this place, so I'll be damned if I'm going home just yet. I need to speak to her, I need to see it with my own eyes. I have to know what happened. All I wanted was a quiet life, one where I could be happy, ignoring the troubles of the world. Things have a funny way of working out. That life that I want isn't mine. I want to fight, I go looking for trouble, seeking out danger, wanting the pain. Settling down and tending a garden all day and watching the sun rise and set? Not for me. I just watched a bunch of brigands die to one of my creations, boils growing and exploding, and their throats corroding… Too bad I couldn't show it to anyone, because I enjoyed it. Probably makes me no better than they were. At least if something happens in here to me, it's not like anyone would miss someone like me. But if this first hurdle was easy, I think I'll be home before the end of the week. Gas is clearing up and its looking safe to move on now. J'essa has to be in here somewhere, I can feel it.

Well Look at That

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